big girl pants

  

so it seems that i am earning some big girl pants- red christmas ones, as a matter of fact! the process started last year. actually, it started last christmas. my sister & her family decided last year that they would fly into norfolk instead of richmond to join us for christmas at my parents in williamsburg. they were arriving the morning after christmas. well, many of us remember last december 26th- the snow started falling christmas evening & didn't stop until there was about 14" on the ground & norfolk airport was shut down. 

 

well, i confess there were some tears as the it dawned on us that we may not be having christmas together. & by christmas i mean the day we have appointed as christmas. i was making a big pot of jambalaya, we were having family friends in for dinner, i had a made a flourless chocolate torte (can you say YUM?) for dessert & some other dishes so we could all eat together. by 5pm sunday evening, kathy let us know that the first flight they could get wasn't until thursday & they were scheduled to leave on friday, so they wouldn't be coming at all. a very sad day.  because, you see, until last year, my sister & i had never spent a christmas apart. so in all my years, since she was born 53 years ago (at that time), we'd always shared our christmases. & now we weren't. it was very sad. she was in chicago with her husband & her two wonderful children & a ton of snow. i was in virginia with a ton of snow, my husband on crutches following an ankle surgery & my wonderful, but aging parents. my mother wasn't feeling well, so that further slowed things down. she spent a lot of time in bed sleeping & recovering. sadie & i took long walks in the snow-which was quite lovely. 

we ended up deciding that we would have a virtual christmas & used gchat. we tried skype, but got a better image from gchat. we showed each other our lovely packages & then unwrapped them & showed each other what we got. it worked okay. here's what christmas looked like before our virtual gift exchange.

my sister had a great time with her family in chicago. my niece has an apartment in chicago & they stayed close to her & enjoyed having a christmas with just their family for the first time. everyone knows how horrid travel at christmas is & if that travel includes travel by air, well......  she's suffered enough! she's been flying east for years. 

so this year, mom & dad said it's just silly for kathy to continue to fly out for christmas. they really wanted danny & i to fly to chicago & spend christmas with them. after all, they said, it's just a day. we'll be fine. we have lots of friends & will be perfectly okay. we'd rather you kids spend it together. (yep, that's how my parents are). danny & i decided that flying out to chicago was not in the cards *** (please see paragraph below for some serious bragging) & that we would stay home & spend christmas with my parents & without my sister.

                                     

which is good for my sister & her family, but sad for us. see sad faces above. we won't be all together with the kids at christmas. my brother came out for a bit of a visit this weekend & kathy decided to come as well, so we had a small family christmas while they were here. it was fun to have the three of us together- it always is when we're all together. it doesn't happen often. so we kind of had christmas together, but mostly not. & this year i'll really earn my bright christmas red big girl pants. sometimes it is really hard to be a true adult. because all i really want to do is pout until i get my way. but i know that's not right. i still want to do it, though. i'll miss you guys- kathy, armand, caitlin, daniel. & i am really glad that you guys get to enjoy a stress free, chicago christmas together- well, at least a part of me is. 

i know we'll talk & gchat on christmas day. & we've been invited to have christmas eve dinner with my good friends in richmond- something i wouldn't have been able to do in past years. so, as is so many things, all lost opportunities include new possibilities & i shall be learning what those are this year as i wear my brand new christmas red big girl pants. if you see me (& you won't be able to miss me in those mega-red underwear), just say hi & merry christmas- how are those big girl pants?

i hope everyone who reads this has a most happy holiday & a great new year. please free to leave comments if you happen to read my blog. i feel like people really do read my blog then. thanks. so happy everything & peace to all. 

****my awesome husband will be starting a low residency MFA in january at university of tampa. he will be on campus 20 days a year; the rest will be distance. he applied to four programs; was accepted by three. his MFA will be focused on writing. i am very proud of him. he starts january 5th, making any christmas travel difficult as far as work goes for him. end of bragging.

bah, humbug

i love christmas! i always have. i've had a history of being overly generous at christmas (i just get so caught up in the season!) & one of the pleasures i've enjoyed for a long time is my habit of shopping year long for christmas presents. if i'm out & about, or happen to be traveling & i see something that i know is just perfect for susan or kathy or gigi or caitlin- well, it is soon purchased & in my possession & under the bed it goes to be stored until christmas. i have some people on my list that are really easy & fun to shop for & i often discover when i go to pull the boxes out that i've way overbought for them & have nothing for others because i forget what i've bought as the year passes. it's like christmas as i discover all the little treasures that i've collected throughout the year & start wrapping.

is that all? where's the rest?

& i love thanksgiving! what a great holiday. relatively without excess (except food, of course). just about gratitude & family & friends. at least, the thanksgivings i grew up with were that way. for the last 10 years, danny & i have rented a place in the outer banks of north carolina & had friends & family down for various parts of the week.

for the past few years, my parents have been unable to come due to health issues & two of the more regular couples that came have been unable to come, so it's just been us. we've enjoyed quiet thanksgivings with ourselves & sadiedog & it's a very relaxing week. if we want turkey for thanksgiving, we have it. if we don't- well, we don't. we are not tied to tradition. if we don't want to cook a big meal, we don't. it's rather liberating, actually! & a great tradition that danny & i intend to continue for a very long time.

so how does the title of this post relate to what i've written? it doesn't sound very 'bah, humbug', does it? until you mention BLACK FRIDAY......  Black Friday has now overtaken thanksgiving, or so it seems. now i love to shop as much as the next person. well, alright, that's not entirely true. i love to shop. a lot. i confess that i've never ventured out the friday after thanksgiving (kind of- i'll qualify that later). when did this Black Friday begin to take on it's own atmosphere?

 it seems to eclipse the holiday of thanksgiving now. although that isn't hard to do with christmas decorations going up right after halloween on november 1st (hats off to nordstrom, who has a policy of never decorating until the day after thanksgiving). this Black Friday thing is crazy though- people getting trampled, waiting in line for hours, stores opening at 12am, 4am, 6am.... i suspect the shoppers are serious shoppers, too. none of the southern gentility that might be present at other times- "no, go ahead. i'm in no hurry."

i am having soooo much fun!

now i have no doubt that there is a combat mentality about all this that unites the shoppers. kind of like 'i survived black friday 2011.' it just seems kind of sad that one of the last major holiday that had nothing to do with shopping has become tainted with this huge event of black friday. & the poor employees having to get up at these ungodly hours to report to work. of course, these are the same employees, usually working for the big box stores that work for mostly minimum wage & already work nights & weekends & long hours. most of them are pretty darn happy to have a job.  then again, i'm sure the customers are very nice & patient & just a joy to provide service to.......

  

 now, having said all that, i do enjoy hitting some stores the day after thanksgiving when i'm at the beach. our tradition of coming to the beach started many years ago when my friend jane owned a place in kitty hawk. we started coming down to spend the weekend of thanksgiving with her- we'd have dinner with the family & leave friday morning. back in those days (1986), thanksgiving weekend was known as an owner's weekend & was usually the last weekend the stores were open for the year, so everything was deeply discounted & jane & i enjoyed getting bargains. we continued that tradition for several years (eventually stopping in the early 1990's, i think) & then my family started renting a place & we came as a family. of course, thanksgiving is no longer an owner's weekend down here. it is big business & the stores still discount deeply. as the outer banks has taken on more of a year round population & feel, more & more stores/services are open year round. there are still many stores that do close for the season; however, some close for january & february only. you can find some pretty good deals. that is the only friday after thanksgiving shopping i've ever done- it doesn't even seem right to call it black friday shopping- it is so much more casual & laid back - although some of the big box stores on the bypass (kmart, walmart, tj maxx) may be more serious.

anyway, that's my lament for days gone by. life was easier then & so on & so on- it was nicer when we weren't so consumer driven, wasn't it?

a confession

as i was getting dressed this morning, it occurred to me that i had a confession to make. after my post yesterday bashing pajama jeans & those who might wear them, i realized that i am guilty of a similar crime. in all fairness, though, i would characterize my crime as a misdemeanor, while pajama jeans are definitely a felony. my misdemeanor is my joyous, blissful wearing of my ugg boots at every opportunity.

i feel so lucky that i can get away with wearing my uggs to work. i annually await the approach of the cooler weather in happy anticipation of the first day the temperature permits the wearing of uggs. uggs are so named because they are ....... UGH!  everyone i know is either neutral or hates them until they try them on. my girlfriend susan was like "meh" until she tried mine on- less than five minutes later we were on the computer ordering her a pair. for those who aren't in the know, uggs are footwear that were developed in australia by surfers who wanted something warm & dry for their feet when they emerged from surfing. they created a boot that is shearling lined with authentic australian sheepskin. the reason i think uggs are a misdemeanor akin to pajama jeans is because wearing them feels like wearing your bedroom slippers. i'm not sure there is a more comfortable outdoor footwear in existence. uggs are made to be worn barefoot & they are soooooo comfortable. of course, when i wear mine, everyone is "i had no idea you were so short" & stuff...  yeah, i am. but, i digress. i thought i should 'fess up since i was so hard on pajama jeans- although they certainly deserved it- there is no doubt they are a fashion felony worthy of mandatory sentencing.  the sentence should be something like one month with tim gunn or heidi klum or something like that. although, heidi was one of the jeggings examples- i'll have to think about that. i wonder if she checked with tim before she wore those?  uggs-  a fashion misdemeanor at worst & maybe not even that. maybe a traffic court kind of thing or a parking ticket? if at all?

here is my ugg collection (they are THAT comfortable).....

two words that should never go together....

well, another long break. i am steadfast in my refusal to be yet another abandoned blog on the web. there are thousands of them. i am always thinking in my head about all these things i can post & write about.. & then along comes a shiny object. 


yesterday, i was packing to come to baltimore, where i am attending some training & ruing the fact that i have no jeans that i wear (i can't remember the last time i wore pants) because i am not happy with the way they look on me. i find myself feeling overdressed almost all the time. my goal is to get back into a pair of jeans. & i won't bore anyone with the details of all of that. so this morning as i was getting dressed, a commercial came on that caught my attention....

pajama jeans

i certainly don't begrudge the concept- nothing wrong with the desire for & being comfortable. however if you are planning on leaving the comfort & sanctity of your home, you should not be clad in anything that has 'pajamas' in the description. there are standards, after all, that supersede comfort. which brings me to my next recent fashion trend that caught my attention...

jeggings

very few of us can pull off jeggings. my personal belief is anytime a new word is blended to describe a new item of clothing- that's a bad sign. clearly, conan cannot pull off jeggings. they don't leave much to the imagination, do they? 

now, of course, there are those who can pull off jeggings & look good in them. my question is- why would they choose to? to me, it's the equivalent of wearing pajama jeans with a designer label. here are a few who can. i am not among them- big surprise there! either is conan!


sienna miller, heidi klum & courtney cox can do it- why do they want to though?

                    

                     

ah- good to be back...

no man (or woman) is an island

For Whom the Bell Tolls

No man is an island, 
Entire of itself. 
Each is a piece of the continent, 
A part of the main. 
If a clod be washed away by the sea, 
Europe is the less. 
As well as if a promontory were. As well as if a manner of thine own 
Or of thine friend's were. 
Each man's death diminishes me, 
For I am involved in mankind. 
Therefore, send not to know 
For whom the bell tolls, 
It tolls for thee.
                - John Donne


today i am diminished.